I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize