LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize
