It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I have tasted many bathrooms
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize