dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
