I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
