My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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