My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
