is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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