When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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