Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize