Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
