You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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