I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Randomize
