Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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