It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Randomize