You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
So here I am, sexting at work.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize