oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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