If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
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