Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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