ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
NoShamevember. You game?
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
