Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
