Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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