I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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