only if we run a train.
done.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize
