Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
