The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
