I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
