Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I'm way too hungover for life right now
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
