Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
