i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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