we have officially lost it.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
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