So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
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