yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
