ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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