my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
He shit in the fireplace
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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