Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize
