You're completely useless in the revolution.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Randomize
