It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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