I just pynch a tree in the face
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
honey bunches of taint.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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