i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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