3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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