Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
