It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
