Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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