I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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