Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
