anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Randomize
