We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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