Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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