Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
how does that bad decision feel?
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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